Security Blanket On A Leash
Sorry it's been so long since I last posted something. I just really haven't been in the mood to attempt to be humorous, but hopefully this post rekindles some sort of consistency in regards to my blogging duties.Last weekend myself and a few guys from school entered the NBA Hoop-It-Up 3 on 3 Basketball Tournament in London, Ontario. Being at this tournament again made me remember how funny it is to watch how volatile and angry people who have no future in organized sport can get when partaking in the game that they love, which in this case, is basketball. It could probably be stated that NBA Hoop It Up brings out the worst in humankind. Everywhere you look, there are people arguing, threatening each other, or full out brawling. As sad as it is, it definitely provides a weekend full of non-stop entertainment for me, the viewer.
Aside from the frequent bickering and arguing that happens at this tournament, the thing that stands out the most is the amount of young men at these tournaments who think they are the biggest badass around. Everywhere you look, you see guys who are wearing thin, tight, t-shirts, smothering themselves with sunblock and who have an entire bottle of hair gel on their heads. These guys are a joke, but they pale in comparison to the amount of guys there who have those stupid bulldogs - or pitbulls, or whatever they are - dragging behind them at all times.
This, to me, is hilarious. These guys walk around the venue, with no shirt on and the stupid dog with them, glaring at people and pretty much trying to give off the aura that they are invincible and that they'll kick your ass at the slightest hint of hostility you direct at them. The funny thing about this concept is that they obviously don't believe that they are as tough as they think they are, otherwise they wouldn't have those retarded dogs armed and ready at all times. Honestly guys, who the hell do you think you are kidding?
These guys are obviously trying to strengthen the tough guy image that they think they have, but the first thing that comes to mind when I see you walking around with that dog is Paris Hilton, with her stupid little chihuahua that she carries around in her purse. Mind you, Paris Hilton is not a bad thing to have on your mind if you're a guy, but if you're trying to spawn the fear of God into someone, that's not the image you want to portray. Those guys might as well get the phrase "I'm a giant pussy" tattooed ont heir foreheads, because let's face it, you aren't jack squat without your pint-sized insurance policy on a string. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that I'm not scared of those dogs, because they're crazy as hell. I've seen them in action.
One year at the tournament I was watching this game between these 4 guys from London and 4 guys from Michigan. It was a heated battle with a lot of physicality and yelling and arguing. The Michigan guys were fouling the London guys pretty hard, and one of the London guys told his opponent that if he fouled him one more time, he was going to kick his ass. Sure enough, the Michigan guy decided to test the London guy's patience. Rather than making good on the threat of himself administering an ass-kicking, he decided to release the hounds, or in this case, the singular hound. An all out war broke out, with the hound getting the best of one of the Michigan players, and the hound's owner receiving a beatdown from the Michigan faithful. Moral of the story: Just because you've got a hound, doesn't mean you will win the war. I'm not sure what the aftermath was, but I'm sure that the one Michigan guy got treated at a hospital, while the owner was probably treated more extensively at the hospital and was probably also arrested. Good thing you had the dog with you buddy!
Stay tuned, I'll try have some better material in the weeks to come.
P.S. I'd like to amend my last entry about Hip-Hop Lyrics. Add this gem to the list --> LFO, "Summer Girls" --> "I'll Steal your honey like I stole your bike"... LFO, what were you thinking???
posted by Chesterfield McFisticuffs III @ 8:11 p.m.
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